sarahthegoblinqueen: some guy came into our class and the teacher didn’t see him until she was doing attendance she saw him and asked “who let you in?” and he said “Ashley Katchadourian” then someone in the back said “Ashley Katchadourian isn’t even in charge of the door”
So I was driving along with my best friend in the passenger seat next to me. Suddenly the car in front of me skidded on ice and I had to emergency brake. Before I knew it my hand was across my friend to stop her from flying forwards She looked at me and told me she couldn’t believe that my first thought would be to save her. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that, as a pizza delivery driver, I...
lolsofunny: WHY DO CATS AND DOGS LOSE ALL COORDINATION WHEN YOU PUT SOMETHING ON THEIR FEET It’s 1:30am and i laughed out loud and my mom woke up and thought i was crying so she made me a hot chocolate like wow what is life
princess-axolotl: vandalswithjetpacks: The idea that people had sex before the 20th century really freaks me out. Like George Washington probably got a blow job and that makes me uncomfortable.
Today I started fights with three different people. Today was a bad day.
sleepingartist: urbancatfitters: if i ever start a band i’m going to name it “music” and then it will be literally impossible to find any of our songs on the internet the first album : “Unknown album” the hit single: “track 1”